SEX, SEX, SEX!!!!!

The purpose of the title of this blog is not to be cute or to create shock value. Its just that sex is sooo prevalent in our society--and not just among those who live apart from the family of God--but it is a huge struggle in the daily life of many Christians. So often we are told that such topics are taboo or not appropriate in a worship setting or among a church fellowship--and I say there is no better place or time to discuss something that God created that was intended to be something beautiful and holy.

Over the next few blog entries, I intend to talk about this subject of sex--that can be a blessing for God's people--or when used out of the marraige covenant--can absolutely destroy families and leave emotional, mental, and spirtual scars for a lifetime! It is not my intention to be overly "Preachy" or condemning of those who struggle with sexual sin. So let me be up front right away and say that sexual sin was always this preacher's worst struggle!

Like many boys growing up in the 70s and 80s, I found my share of dirty magazines and was quickly drawn to desire the images in which I had been exposed. I think by the time I was 14, I probably had a dozen dirty magazines hidden under my bed. By the time I was 15, I was exposed to hardcore cenematic pornography at a buddy's house. Over the next few years, I found myself getting more and more addicted to porn--in any shape or size I could get that exposure. I remember wanting and desiring to find a nice girl to marry some day--but I also was so obsessed with wanting to experience sex--that it just almost seemed silly to wait to get married first. It seemed that I should make sure the sex part would be good first. And so I remember not looking at girls the way I should have. I remember not looking at girls and women as my mothers, sisters, and daughters--but as something less--much less!

And it wasn't that my parents did not try to raise me with good values on that subject. My parents did wait til they were married to be intimate and I remember being taught that sex out of marraige could cause a lot of problems. And yet--children's hormones are changing day by day--and it doesn't take much to set those hormones off in a big way once a young man or woman gets exposed to things they were not yet meant to see. Fortunately for me, I was too much of a "dork" as my wife often refers to me as when I was younger and I was unable to get into sexual sin in my teen years. But it was not for lack of trying!

But my time came in my early 20s and I then discovered the reality of pre-marital sex--I was quickly hooked. I remember some very unhealthy relationships--that only created lots of pain and hurt on both sides of the relationship. And scripture teaches us that once we start sinning--it gets easier and easier to slip deep into that sin! I remember not treating some of my girlfriends very well and treating them just shamefully. I remember being almost desensitized to sexual sin--and not caring about what pain it might cause myself or others.

When I became a Christian when I was 27, the first few months I stayed very pure and was determined to stay that way. But it only took an old relationship I had once been impure with, to hit me at just the right weak moment--and I was back into sin again. And over the next couple of years of being a young, new Christian--I struggled with wanting to stay pure--but those fleshly desires had already been given into--and the temptation was constantly on my back!

Later in my first few years of marraige, I loved my wife dearly and very much desired her--but like many men--struggled some off and on with pornography and lustful thoughts. And then I would struggle with those awful feelings of guilt and shame. However, by the grace of God--and my relationship with Jesus continuing to grow over the years--God has helped me overcome much of that struggle and I can honestly say--that I only desire my wife. She is absolutely beautiful to me and I know that is who God gave me and I want to honor my covenant--with both my wife and with God! However, as wonderful as that is--I am not so naive as to think that if I let my gaurd down for a moment--that Satan would look for any opportunity to tempt me so my marraige and family could be destroyed! Scripture tells us to watch closely and be on gaurd at all times. NONE OF US ARE EXEMPT FROM SATAN'S LURING LIES AND DECEPTION!!!

My heart now, desires to look at women as my mothers, my daughters, and my sisters. And I so want that for my boys too! I want my boys to grow up to be Godly men who treat their future wives with honor and respect and learn to love their wives as Jesus loves the Church as Paul teaches us in Ephesians 6. But I know that there are many odds against my boys and your boys and your girls. The world (and the powers of darkness) are working non-stop to lure our children into sin. The world says "Go ahead and grow up now and experience grown up stuff now." And innocence is being destroyed daily! But our God is more powerful! The corner can be turned and victories for our children's futures can be won! We will be talking about all these things that are at stake over the next several days in this series. We will be talking about how God wants sex to be something absolutely beautiful for His children--not something to be abused and lives destroyed and much pain be handed out for generations! This is something God's people need to be talking about desperately! Lets have a conversation.